A séance is a chilling ceremony where a group of drunk, giggling asshats attempt to contact spirits by performing a set of unholy rituals. I have conducted a few séances myself, none of which were successful, but I will guide you through the process as I have learned it from SoYouWanna.com. This fantastic website teaches you how to do just about anything! Read More »

One of the most brutal donkey punches to a person's life, alongside such tragedies like birthing a retarded baby, gangrene, and bankruptcy, is the dreadful DUI. It's so tragic that they should make sympathy greeting cards for it. Read More »

When can uber-hobbit Vern Troyer be lumped into a category with luminescent stars like Pamela Anderson, Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian, Colin Farrell and even Marilyn Monroe? When we're talking about celebrity sex tapes of course! Each one of these glittering bungholes has starred in their very own sex tape! Read More »

Today's hottest accessory isn't an African baby, a DJ lesbian lover, or even a giant ass.  If you want to roll with the in crowd, then you need to grab a hold of summer's most fashionable item: a creepy father!!  Read More »

The following is my standard prank call that I use every Saturday night, home, alone, lonely.  It works best when you have a good friend of the prank-calling victim with you to acquire personal details...and if you're a woman. Try it yourself, it's a hoot! Read More »

If you have no life like me, then chances are you spend every second of every day wondering: When will Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie get married? Well, now you don't have to! I have imagined the potential story of their wedding day, and it's all right here for your enjoyment! Read on! Read More »