>>> About Last Night…
By staff writerAli Wisch
December 21, 2005

I am a believer in the idea that if you want it bad enough, you can get it. And girls, this is especially true when in search of a compatible male. Because seriously, guys are not that complicated. Once you have him figured out he’s yours, strings attached (or not, depending on what you’re into). Before I go any further you must go into this thinking there is no reason he wouldn’t be into you, you are just as good as him, and you look damn hot. Be overconfident and think you’re the shit. Picture Kristen from Laguna.

So you’ve been into this guy for a while—he might be your best friend, or he might not know you exist. The first thing you want to do is find out what he’s into. Does he play sports? What kind of music does he like? Who does he hang out with? Once you have your hands on this information, figure out what you have in common. Do you both love indie rock or are you both huge Steelers fans? It is important that you guys like some of the same things. If the only common interests you can come up with are beer and the school you go attend, you might want to reconsider this conquest.

Now that you know a little about him, be confident. Confidence is a major turn-on for most guys. That being said, before you get ballsy enough to call him, find a way to “run into him,” or somehow make his acquaintance. The best way to do this is to work his party scene into your schedule. If he’s in a fraternity, this is especially easy. If he’s not in a fraternity, you should still be able to figure out where he parties, and end up there yourself. Once at the party, if you can get someone to introduce you, the game is on and the ball is in your court.

Now that he has met you, it’s time to get his phone number. This is a lot easier if you have been drinking. However, I recommend you do this when you’re not totally drunk; waking up in the morning and seeing him in your phonebook under “bqosten” with the phone number 802728374829 will probably bum you out. Once you’ve got the digits don’t be afraid to use them. It’s cool if you want to wait a day or two, but don’t give it too long because it really really sucks introducing yourself on the phone as, “Hey it’s Ali, remember me? From Chad’s party? Blue shirt? Red hair? No? Shit.” The best time to call him is when you know something cool is going on. I have found that the most chill situation is when one of my good friends is having a party. This way you know it will be fun and you will be one of the only people he knows there.

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As long as you have kept your shit together at this party, i.e. no puking on his shirt, run-ins with your ex, spillage, or party fouls in general, you should be on for round two. In round two I think it’s best to downsize from a full-blown rager to just chilling with him and some friends. From this point on it shouldn’t be hard to downsize to a one-on-one match.

While you’re reeling him in, try to give him your phone number at the party and wait a couple of days. Now that he knows you, it will totallyboost your confidence if he gives you a call. If he doesn’t call, I still say give it a try; if he doesn’t answer or return your message at least you know he’s an assholebefore you waste any more time. Also, if you do get wasted the first time you chill, try not to sleep with him. We’ve all done this before—sometimes it works out and sometimes it bites you in the ass. All guys like getting laid but in general they don’t like getting laid by sluts—and if they do they probably won’t call you the next day and probably will give you an STD.

These tidbits of advice should work, however there are certain situations in which it is clever to just back off. For example, if he has a girlfriend don’t even begintrying to lure him to you. If you do go after him or hook up with him while he is “taken,” you can pretty much be guaranteed some serious repercussions from his woman and her friends, and you’ll lose your second chance to hook up with him because you’ll always be “the girl he cheated with.” There is also the occasional man-whore who cannot be tamed. This kind of guy loves to play games and loves to chase/be chased, but unless you’re looking for one night of fun I wouldn’t waste your smooth tactics on him. Leave that to the freshman girls (no offense, I did it when I was there too). Lastly, if he is one of your friends’ ex-boyfriends, I say stay away. He may be ridiculously hot, fun and into you, but unless you’re willing to sacrifice your relationship with your girl for a relationship with this guy, just stay away. Now go get ’em girls.