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In Memoriam: The Crocodile Hunter
Posted September 5th, 2006 by Chad Chamley
In case you haven't heard Steve Irwin, better know as The crocodile Hunter, has been killed. According to reports he was filming a program about the Great Barrier reef when a stingray barb went through his chest and killed him before medical help could arrive. The hardcore SOB even pulled the barb out before losing consciousness.
I seriously didn't know stingrays could kill people. I just thought they stung people and occasionally rayed them. I mean of all the animals he fucked with over the years a stingray? Irony is a cruel mistress. Why couldn't you take someone that didn't entertain me like Ryan Seacrest or that guy who yells all the time on Extreme Home Makeover. He never does any work. He is never laying on the line every show like the Croc Hunter. One false move on the Croc Hunter set and you lose a testicle. The worst thing that could happen those Seacrest and that other queer is that they could lose their voice. Pussies.
Steve Irwin always seemed like he was hopped up on happy pills but thats the way he was. The man lived with no fear and was trying to make the world a better place. He made a movie, all be it a bad one, and donated all of the money he was suppose to make to wildlife conservation. Something to think about when you're taking out the trash from your weekend bender and there are 70 empty beer cans that could be recycled. Its not putting your life on the line to entertain drunk college kids when they catch your show late at night. I now feel kind of guilty for openly rooting for the alligators and crocodiles a few times.
Now the man who made Crikey! a global term is sleeping with the fishes. Ok, that may have been a poor choice of words considering he was killed by a fish but you get my point. The next time you're enjoying a Fosters poor a little out for your boy Steve.
Just make sure you recycle the can when you're finished.
RIP Steve Irwin
(1962-2006)
In case you haven't heard Steve Irwin, better know as The crocodile Hunter, has been killed. According to reports he was filming a program about the Great Barrier reef when a stingray barb went through his chest and killed him before medical help could arrive. The hardcore SOB even pulled the barb out before losing consciousness.
I seriously didn't know stingrays could kill people. I just thought they stung people and occasionally rayed them. I mean of all the animals he fucked with over the years a stingray? Irony is a cruel mistress. Why couldn't you take someone that didn't entertain me like Ryan Seacrest or that guy who yells all the time on Extreme Home Makeover. He never does any work. He is never laying on the line every show like the Croc Hunter. One false move on the Croc Hunter set and you lose a testicle. The worst thing that could happen those Seacrest and that other queer is that they could lose their voice. Pussies.
Steve Irwin always seemed like he was hopped up on happy pills but thats the way he was. The man lived with no fear and was trying to make the world a better place. He made a movie, all be it a bad one, and donated all of the money he was suppose to make to wildlife conservation. Something to think about when you're taking out the trash from your weekend bender and there are 70 empty beer cans that could be recycled. Its not putting your life on the line to entertain drunk college kids when they catch your show late at night. I now feel kind of guilty for openly rooting for the alligators and crocodiles a few times.
Now the man who made Crikey! a global term is sleeping with the fishes. Ok, that may have been a poor choice of words considering he was killed by a fish but you get my point. The next time you're enjoying a Fosters poor a little out for your boy Steve.
Just make sure you recycle the can when you're finished.
RIP Steve Irwin
(1962-2006)
12 Comments
I just heard that Australia Zoo had to call an emergency board meeting. Apparently there was something that Steve needed to get off his chest.
But seriously, the funeral is going to be a big event. They're even inviting some big names that were once friends of Steve, like STING, RAY Romano and BARBara Streisand.
I guess it's like they always say: If theres one thing worse than getting sunburnt it's catching too many rays.
It's nice to see I'll have some company in hell.
If hell if filled with that many puns, i can't wait to get there. You're a man/woman after my own heart, Pazza.
And honestly, Steve Irwin was gonna die sooner or later from some animal. Maybe this was mother nature's way of sparing him from a more vicious ending, like getting torn apart by a tiger, or eaten by a croc.
In the last decade only 17 people have died from stingray attacks.
My goal when I die is to be the only one to die in that matter.
First to Die by a Blogged Artery: Mike Faerber.
The Heart of the Matter 9/6/36
Today I'm just not feeling very vessel-like. I got a new plasma screen, today, and I literally watched an entire discovery channel show on reproduction. I think i got into the wrong field. I should have been an alveolus or a vas deferens.
I think I'm going to slit my hips today.
"...and when you hear how some people bite it...you laugh."
-Dane Cook
I wasn't shocked at all when I heard that he died. I was saddened for a moment, but he really did have it coming.
Gosh, that stingray is such a croc-block.
That was for you Court.
Thank you Court! At least there is one other person in the world who understands that if you spend your life fucking around wild animals and pissing them off, one day one of them will not be able to take it anymore! It was bound to happen eventually, I always knew it would, just didn't know the exact details of how it would go down.
Did they ever catch the stingray? The stingray that killed the crock hunter
He was a really good guy, he'll be missed by many.
(Sidenote: all be it? I think it's albeit.)
You guys can't be serious.
He had it comming to him? It's not like he was killing children and finally got the death penalty. A good man has died and all we can say is "I told you so" and "I knew it was going to happen".
FOR SHAME
Quote: You guys can't be serious.
Actually, everything on this site is said with absolute seriousness. There are no jokes.
(Sidenote: all be it? I think it's albeit.)
I read the whole article and didn't care about anything except albeit, myself. Although I DID enjoy watching his shows, and I belive he DID have it coming, I'm saddened that people are making puns at an upbeat man's death. Let's all give one last CRIKEY! to Mr. Steve Irwin R.I.P.
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