Dr. Phil: Prophet

Who in the world would seriously watch this shit?

Well I do because that is what the old ladies watch while I'm eating my ham and cheese sandwich at work. At first I hated the idea of Dr. Phil getting his own show. It just gave me another reason to hate Oprah. However, after being forced to watch a few shows I have to admit that I love it. It tells you how to be a sleaze ball or asshole if you want pointers. I have learned so much from this dipshit. Let's take a look at what I have learned about being a sleaze ball/asshole from watching Dr. Phil.

1)If you are an abusive boyfriend it's ok to write a letter to your girlfriend stating "I am sorry I hurt you. When are you going to come over so I can fuck you and you can suck this? Oh and your mother is a bitch"

2)Telling your wife she is fat and ugly is great. Making her shave her toes is even better. She can be called a pig because she dips her steak in butter.

3)Also it is awesome to tell your wife her job is to fill your belly and empty your balls.

4) Choking and beating up your girlfriend for not doing the laundry is a cool now.

5)Then calling her father and telling him to come pick up his bitch and her baby is great.

6)If you are a moocher and live with your brother and his wife or your parents or you have your wife pay your child support while you sit on the couch you are a hero.

7)Also stealing money from your kids to smoke crack is acceptable.

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