History- Men of old had no time nor equipment for frivolous trimming of their locks, something about their axes being dulled by the repeated crushing of bone and tendons. Only thanks to recent technological developments (i.e. lasers, sharp wit) has it been possible for The Perfectionist to emerge with Hellenic disgust for anything that doesn’t adhere to The Golden Ratio.
Unjustly stigmatized as the words-over-action non-male by many, including myself, The Perfectionist should not be underestimated. Or overestimated. You must calculate him out to 17 decimal places lest you engage the fury of his fists, named Form and Function… guess which strikes first.
Thrill-seeking ladies should proceed with caution, for yes it’s true, he only does missionary, but every touch, every undone button is made with pinpoint calculations for maximum pleasure efficiency. He washed his blueprinted sheets from last weekend, already planning your next lip-quivering moment of ecstacy. Often times, foreplay will take hours as he accepts nothing less than a perfect one-thrust multigasm.
Don’t expect him to cuddle, however. He floats exactly 25 centimeters above the bed, so as not to have to remake it.
Nicknames- The Accountant, The Hitman, The Model, and “Oh you’re so Handsome!… thanks Grandma!”
Ups- Just plain attractive. Nothing says you have your life together like a face that would break a boxer’s hand.
Downs- Good luck getting a girl to kiss you anywhere else.