I'll See You in the Office

Hey, remember me? Your old buddy from high school! How ya doin? Ya look great. Me, I'm still living with my parents. Right now I don't have a job, but I'm trying to keep sending out positive vibes, so I'll get a sweet job, like being in charge of the police' evidence locker.

How's that company you founded? Still going strong? I'm really glad to hear it. When do your options vest? Man, you've got it made. I can't say I'm not a little bit jealous. But I'm happy with the way things turned out. It's only been three weeks since I turned in my application to Jiffy Lube. I expect to hear back tomorrow or maybe the next day. Also, my mom needs my help getting the leaf out of the dining room table this weekend.

So what's it like being part of the jet set? Can't say I'm not curious. Me, I pretty much watch adult videos all afternoon. And you're there making big business decisions! People get fired...people get promoted...the stockholders get their dividends. Still, even if you had asked me to join, I probably couldn't have. Back then, I was mentally locked in for that downhill course in San Luis Obispo. No, I probably couldn't have made the commitment anyway.

Of course, I wouldn't be telling the truth if I said I didn't feel a little regret now and then. But what is regret besides wasted energy? Let me ask you something: you got any janitorial openings? I know that's a bit insulting to me. If you want, I can put the fear of God into your programming staff. No offense, but your interface looks like shit.

Omar