Coffee mug made out of coffee beans

I’ve never met anybody with a lower tolerance for caffeine than me. I generally drink about half a cup of coffee and I fly around town for hours. Then crash considerably. My taste buds also rank pretty low, so I drink the sludgiest, unsweetened, and cheapest java.

For I while I kept a jar of instant just chilling in my place. Then I realized sometimes I get tired at work, so I decided to bring some to my university office. I put some in a screw-on Tupperware thing and took the original jar to work.

Usually instead of going through the pain of finding a cup, taking a teaspoon of instant coffee, and then mixing in hot water (my office floor features a combination hot water dispenser/water cooler) I just dip my little spoon in and drop the ten or twelve granules on my tongue to let them dissolve. Does it taste good? Nope. Does it do the trick? Yep.

Yet another weird thing about me is that I kind of enjoy washing dishes. It’s pretty mindless. Also, I like squirting the soap all around, and washing dishes well makes me feel like I cook well. Sadly, that’s not the truth. The bad thing about washing dishes is that I spray water everywhere by accident.

One day I felt tired at home, so I wanted to take my coffee as usual: like a prescription pill. I opened my Tupperware and "Huh?!?" I found a solid shiny-brown rock. Oh crap. Some of my dishwater leaked in. Well, on top of being lazy and highly caffeine non-resistant, I’m also pretty cheap. So I just took a bite out of the shiny-brown rock and continued with my day.

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Did it work? Yep. Was it gross? I guess so. But I have about 200 more bites left, then I’ll buy a new jar of instant.

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