Shock and/or Awe

The other day I was having a conversation with my friend Lamar about how two universally important terms when it comes to drinking are "last call" and "open bar." Both strike a nerve in people immediately. No matter what you're doing, you'll probably respond (for better or worse) to both.

So, I decided to come up with a few more universally "important" two word phrases that will usually grab anyone's attention. I call them shockers, but you can call them knockers if you're feeling horny, or shamrocks if you're feeling lucky. I don't really give a shit.

Two Word Shockers

1. Not guilty.
2. I'm pregnant.
3. Last call!
4. Open bar.
5. It's malignant.
6. Don't shoot!
7. Password invalid.
8. Application denied.
9. I'm coming!!
10. They're real.


Three Word Shockers
The corresponding three words bearing some sort of pre- or post-significance to the two word shockers above.

1. License and registration.
2. It's not yours.
3. I can drive.
4. Tips not included.
5. Is it cancer?
6. It's the police.
7. Please try again.
8. Bad credit OK!
9. Did you go?
10. Are they real?

Feel free to add something I missed in the comments!
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3 Comments

 Bryan's picture

kasdl;fjalkj the funniest part of this whole post was that picture of the "shocked" Asian dude. For some reason that struck me as hilarious.

Good entry as well, though.

 Court's picture

This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

 Court's picture

Ah yes, the "Asian dude," also known as Emotion Eric.

I've been hip to Emotion Eric for many years now. You can also check out another good use I found for him in 2003's Stop Sneezing article.

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