<<<< Click the notepad to use an away message



I'm in the bathroom because I'd rather put up with my crap than yours.

Takin' a crap. Wanna help with the paperwork?

Nature called, so I'm giving it a load of shit for bothering me.

Back in a flush.

Even though I have a potty mouth, my ass still prefers to take a shit in the bathroom.

You can't change the past. All you can change is your underwear. And if you wear the past on your ass, your future can only be so fresh. BRB...taking a shit.

"Hello? Ohhh, hey! Okay, be right there."
(That was Nature calling. BRB.)

Bathroom...be back later. Much, much later.

You're gonna have to hold it because I can't.

Doctors say that it is good for us to drink 8-10 glasses of water a day. Unfortunately it has its consequences.

Getting my crap on....(THE FLOOR!)

Hey get out of this away message, I'm taking a shower! Pervert!!

Crap. I gotta crap.

Showering…Australian for beer.

They say if you eat enough chocolate your crap will turn brown.  I’ll be the judge of that.

I bet George Washington is up in heaven right now saying, “What the hell are you doing in the shower son?”  Well I don’t care! I need to be clean okay!  You’re not my dad!

I’m peeing in my pants. I don’t know why I chose to write that in an away message though…

I’m taking a crap but I'm out of toilet paper.  Funny how I had the foresight to write that in this away message, yet still did nothing about it.

I'd love to chat but currently a log of shit is rolling out of my body and into its watery haven.  That's right, I'm in the shower.